Relationships with a Sociopath

Let There Be Light

Archangels-joker-card-1-It’s ironic that this page is in black in and white because there’s nothing black and white about a life with a sociopath.  In fact it’s quite the opposite!  The sociopath is much more like “The Joker”, and a life with sociopath is even like “Wonderland” and you’re Alice….nothing, and I mean nothing, is what it seems with a sociopath!

What is a a Sociopath?  so·ci·o·path *

  1. a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.


What makes a sociopath the way they are? They have a personality disorder that makes them pathological liars, manipulators, cheaters, users, abusers, and sometimes worse.  The scariest part about them is that they lack empathy or the ability to put themselves in other people’s shoes and they lack conscience so what’s to keep them from coming into your life, creating this person that seems to be the mate of your dreams, your hero, your ultimate fantasy in every-way only to get something they want from you and not batting an eye too how much they wreck your life, your heart, your soul? The answer……nothing!

Pretty scary stuff considering they have a way of perfecting their “character” and hiding their true identity which lies under whatever mask they are wearing at the time.  They are like a stealth bomber, coming in undetected and dropping a bomb on you that you never saw coming! Life with a sociopath can have your questioning your own sanity, your own reality, and they seem to have a way of putting some sort of spell on the people they are drawn to and want in their lives.  They become an addiction somehow like a drug that you can’t stop taking even though you know it’s killing you!

Please join us here in this place where everything IS what it seems, share your story in the Forum, gain support from me and other’s who have been affected by a sociopath or psychopath, this is a safe place where you can let out all that you’ve kept in, all the secrets and the pain you’ve endured.  I want this black and white paged website to remind you that black and white really does exist in this world, real people, real things, do exist and you don’t have to suffer at the hands of the “The Joker” any longer!

© Bella Ireland,,, all names and content on this site are written by, owned by and copyrighted to Bella Ireland and shall not be taken or duplicated in any way. Copyright infringement will be enforced!

#sociopath #psycopath

7 thoughts on “Let There Be Light”

  1. Dear Bella,
    I too have lived with a sociopath for over two years and am now just rid of her for three months. She is perfectly described in the traits that are listed on the psychopathy checklists of H. Cleckley and R. Hare. I am scarred from this experience and I want to share my story with you and hopefully someday make sense of it all. At first I thought that it was me and the way I responded to her….but now I know she is a sick evil person that will never know the feelings that most of us are capable of.

    Let me know what you would like to hear and I can write you my own horrible experience.



  2. Hi Gunner,

    Would you mind putting a post with summary of your life with her or what ever you’d like to say in my forum on this site! I really need to get that forum up and off the ground. I am so sorry for your suffering but glad to have found you! Together we can share our experiences and begin to help others. As far as my book if you could email me at with maybe whatever story/stories you’d like to share with the world for my book and any tips you have on spotting soc as well as healing and moving on from one that would be so helpful! I look forward to hearing back from you!


  3. Hello,
    After reading the replies and article, I am realizing I have been married to a sociopath……we’ve been married a year and it’s been horrible. We dated 9 months and he was great, giving, considerate, and good to my kids. But after we married everything changed dramatically. I began finding out random lies….not any benefit on his end,just odd weird lies, like what would someone bnother doing that kinda thing….very impulsive! No goals no ambition…..began keeping me from his family members, as the truth would probably be revealed…..having emotional affairs with women, blatantly lying to them….disappearing constantly…..
    Then his sister told me he is a sociopath….that confirmed it for me…..I’ve never been involved or even around an individual such as this….I have no idea what to do….I respect marriage and don’t want divorce but I don’t know what to do..

  4. With years after marrying the angel of my dreams, I’ve lost my integrity, my reputation, my dignity, my relationship with my two sons and my daughter,and that’s just what she’s done for entertainment. Some of her latest projects include being absolutely obsessed with getting me fired for the last 6 weeks, and with her most recent act of kindness went before a judge with her typical stories that have sprinkles of truth twisted into something that doesn’t even exist and then filled with fabricated information to fill in the holes. And managed to get a temporary restraining order on me that is now isolated me from my work materials and some of my tools but now has my job in serious jeopardy.I’m still trying to figure out why. it would take me several weeks, and a lot of painstaking memories to write down even a fraction of the extremely bizarre behavior and events that I’ve been dealing with for the past 3 years. This all started about 1 week after we got married and moved into our new town home with our three children. At that time, my two sons that were 12 and 14, and her daughter that was 11. My oldest son very quickly had to move back with his mother in Canada due to the volatile relationship with my wife created with him very quickly. Within 6 months for own daughter moved back with her father with the Court’s blessing.she create fantastic stories about having cancer and brain lesions and other outrageous health problems that don’t exist. She uses these fantasies to get herself out of court dates, and to gain sympathy from neighbors. I’ve been clearing up stories for 3 years now about treatment the every listed surgeries that never happened just to scratch the surface. A year and a half ago she finally had to come clean that she had 7 felony counts of fraud but she was supposed to go to court for. She only came clean because she got arrested after getting caught lying to the judge about cancer treatment that didn’t exist for the sole purpose of getting out of court. I still believed in her that time and went to the ends of the earth put our entire family in jeopardy to borrow the money to bail her out. The judge put $100,000 bond on her, it took me a week to find a bondsman that would work with me to help me get her out but I went for Leslie at it and found that bondsman. I’m still paying for that, as well as the ten grand to the attorney that she lied to over and over again, and ended up getting the same thing the public defender was getting her. She made a big mistake on her part now though, With her being on probation for those seven counts of fraud it was a bad idea to break into one of my bank accounts and set up a unauthorized payment to make a cell phone payment on a cell phone that she used her dead sisters identity to open the account with. I feel like I’m having to resort to stooping to her own level in order to defend myself from this monster. But I’m not missing this opportunity, she’s looking at eight and a half years from her probation any new charges. This is one sociopath that’s going down for the count. I’m a very well not have my job tomorrow due to the complete wreck my personal life is in today.I work for a very prominent hematology company. I’m on a team because of my integrity. I’m on this team because we don’t call in sick, or call in to have to go deal with a restraining order, or anything else. This relationship has caused me to leave my team to take care of her selfish demands and fake visits to the emergency room for the sole purpose of sympathy so many times that my team has lost faith in me now. When one of us is out there’s a big strain on the rest of us. This is why my manager, and our HR department are currently scheduling a meeting for tomorrow to determine what to do about my current employment. I have pleaded with them and tried my best to explain to them what I’m going through. They do seem to understand and sympathize, but that doesn’t get me out there getting my job done correctly. This person has single handedly done more damage in the three years that we’ve been together then all the other people on the planet have ever done together. I turn 50 years old this year, and the last thing I needed was the have to start over so some selfish, sick individual, could find yourself some extra sympathy and attention.

  5. Sorry for the horrible English on my previous post. Living in my car I’m unable to plug my laptop in, so I’m using the voice text to write that last post on my phone. This technology, combined with my accent, leaves a bit to be desired on the final draft I’m afraid.

  6. Hi there,
    I have only recently discovered that I might have been married to a sociopath after reading a lot about their sick traits I think I could have been married to one but am not still 100% sure. Very confused at the moment.
    Any advice would be very much appreciated.

  7. 8 looooooong years in a relationship with a sociopath and I’m just beginning to walk away. I don’t even know where to begin or what to begin with sharing my story. It is a dramatic tale of hurt, pain, forgiveness, bitterness, resentful and many more feelings. Too long to write as a comment but I have a story to tell and after reading about sociopaths, I now know what is wrong with the man I spent 8 long years with. Depression has plagued me for so long and I just want the light to shine down on me and not have my joy taken away.

Leave a Reply